Kristin Larsen

Ideas That Ignite Curiosity To Love With Courage!

Expanding The Inner Capacity For Unease

Many meanings could be derived from the word “unease.” A few meanings that come to my mind when I think of unease are stress, tension, struggle, and discomfort. I have thought about how someone is capable of expanding the inner capacity for unease in the moment.

As I reflect on my own experiences, I acknowledge one area of focus which helps reduce unease. It is the nourishing actions that can be taken to navigate the stresses in the experiences. The other invitation is to expand the inner capacity to be with the unease.

What could expanding the inner capacity to be with unease mean?

Staying Stuck in the Unease

In that state of frustration, helplessness, powerlessness, it is not reasonable to imagine or see the possibility to have the capacity to be with unease. It can be extremely uncomfortable. It might feel like something must be wrong. A strong-willed judgement about what is being experienced.

An inner subconscious voice says it is something that must be solved. There are steps that must be taken to relieve the suffering as if resembling some sort of systematic equation.

It feels like there is relief when a result is produced. It could be a desired outcome, remembering when a desired outcome happened, feeling belief in something, feeling accepted by others, feeling connection with others, the ideation of being right, honoring one’s own values. *

Getting Unstuck From the Unease

Something that remains constant in the discomfort of unease is choice. The ego wants to have input towards if the choice will be legitimately helpful or safe to move away from unease.

What can be helpful in transforming a disempowering experience into an empowering experience is dedicating focus to habits and behavior.

Taking the time to understand what habits support being with unease and navigating in it’s space. Some habits may include practicing self compassion, meditating, praying, slowing down to be in silence, journaling, exercise, yoga, or simply getting outside in nature.

Creating awareness for behaviors that nurture the evolution of healing and empowerment. Authentic self expression that enables acceptance for vulnerability. Having accountability for the intentions being lived into. Allowing trust to encompass being within the experience.

Being With The Unease In Grace

The discomfort is setting in. I am feeling helpless. I am not seeing choices. I am feeling the stress of this experience. I notice my breathing speeding up. My awareness offers a choice that I now see. I place my focus on my breath. I take a moment to slow it down. Giving my attention to deep inhales and exhales. My awareness is expanding. I notice the tension in my body. With each exhale, I give myself permission to release the tension from my body. In this release I give myself compassion. This is a moment of struggle. May I give myself love and understanding right now. I will let this be ok, I will be ok.

As I surrender to this moment I feel a sense of peace. I am at peace. Possibility enters my vision. Gently, I ask myself what I need right now.

Subtly, I realize I am now with the unease in a greater capacity.

Awareness awakens the possibility to surrender in the moment. The invitation to kindly ask “what is available to give to self.”

*Information referenced from National Library of Medicine, (article) The Unease Modulation Model: An Experiential Model of Stress With Implications for Health, Stress Management, and Public Policy, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6567485/

Realizing Your True Potential

How Do You Know What Your True Potential Is?

As life unfolds, each experience presents the opportunity to realize our true potential. 
Our true potential could manifest from many forms of action. It can be a choice, an intention, a commitment, an inspiration, a vision, a responsibility.

What if it was as simple as acknowledging who you would like to be in a moment, believing in your capability, having conviction in what is possible?


If you think about these 3 statements, what arises within you?


The true potential understands the acceptance in those statements.
The focus of true potential is not concerned with worry or doubt in the moment.
The present moment IS the objective, to thrive in the fullest expression of yourself. Contained within that fullness of expression is immense gratitude.

When Will Be The Moment Of Realizing Your True Potential?


A noticeable shift will occur. The shift is an inner energy that accompanies a chosen state of being. It is a higher state of consciousness. An attuned frequency that connects to your soul. A decision to accept capability to embrace the true potential within you. The focus of concern for a result, a failure or attachment to other external influences fades into the background as the courageous authentic form of yourself leads with powerful intention and integrity.

When were the moments in your life where you accessed your true potential?

Take a moment to reflect what occurred within yourself during those moments.

What shifted in your thoughts? 

What shifted in your energy?

What shifted in your perspective or focus?

What shifted in beliefs?

What shifted in your physiology? 

What was your new self concept of yourself?

There are 4 experiences that come to my mind when I think of some defining moments in my life where I made the decision to access my true potential;

  • The Birth of our first child
  • Performing new job role in my work career
  • Enrolling in a health coaching course
  • Participating in a transformational leadership course

The Choice to Embrace Everything That Already Exists Within

To add some context, these four experiences were lived in five years or more apart from each other. They layered learning and growth that I had navigated in my life to that point.

The first experience was the birth of our first child. Leading to that moment was excitement, anticipation, excellence, quest for knowledge, preparation. These areas of focus minimized the worry and doubt. I had already committed to being the best father I could be. My only worries or doubts came in the form of not being able to live up to those expectations I was committing to.The true potential I was able to access was being able to adapt to situations and become resourceful quickly. Embracing an embodiment of self compassion and loving care. Accepting a responsibility to something/someone that served a purpose greater than myself. I was able to do many things I had never done before or thought I could do with such confidence. The moment my child was presented to me, I held him with amazement and wonder. How could I be holding such a gift of life in my arms? It was a precious, sacred moment that filled me with pure joy and gratitude. My true potential emerged to be my commitment through my intentions each day. To be a supportive husband and loving partnership in the learning and growth in those new moments.

The second experience was performing a new role in my work career. Feeling stagnant at my work, I decided to try something new. It meant getting outside my comfort zone. It meant there was a potential for making mistakes. The opportunity was presented to develop my communication skills, conceptualize processes, adapt to learning, and share ideas to support the performance of others to implement their new learning. It meant being committed to being an important part of establishing a team effort to maximize the development of effective results.

The third experience was enrolling in a health coaching program because I came to the realization it was my calling. It required me to look within myself and be present with my insecurities. To put the higher purpose of supporting someone before my own egoic agenda. I learned how to ask powerful questions, understand what contributes to a strong mindset and healthy functioning in life. Helping someone to implement many habits that are life changing. It was something I could help someone make transformational changes in their life. All because I was able to hold a space of compassion, support, accountability, encouragement and possibility. They were powerful intentions that I embraced within myself.

The fourth experience was participating in a transformational leadership course. Over a 3 month period I created a strong bond with other program participants. We practiced living into our intentions, supporting each other, being a stand for each other, holding each other accountable, connecting with each other, loving each other and holding each other at our highest selves. It was a challenging experience which brought out many patterns that created obstacles for ourselves, limiting beliefs, and pain that required presence and healing. There were lessons in every part of the experience. I released parts of me that I knew were inside but not able to come out and lead. I was introduced to what it feels like to live in higher self. To let go and surrender to what is. To accept myself for who I am so I could be the person I chose through my commitment and intentions.

What these experiences taught me was that a direct connection between possibility and potential exists. Believing in both and trusting that a higher dimension of oneself is awaiting acknowledgement. What got in the way of realizing my true potential was my ego, daily habits that were not supporting my higher self, my continual patterns of disfunction and the required healing to let go of the attachment to inner suffering. It prevented me from being the full expression of my authentic self and to embrace the wholehearted person that I am meant to be in life.

What have the pivotal moments in your life taught you about what holds you back from realizing your true potential?

A choice exists to view true potential as a future possibility that allows the belief to also be a present reality.

Negative Self Talk Dilemma

The Inner Voice Guidance

There is an inner voice we all have that is communicating. If you think it is muted, you might be unconsciously aware of what is being communicated internally.

The challenge is cultivating the awareness to hear when the inner voice is speaking. Move through the conflict of the negative self talk dilemma. Many people think if they choose to listen they might have to do or be what the voice is communicating. Taking what is being said as “truth.”

I have found that by choosing not to acknowledge the voice, it continues to get intensified, trying to get my attention.

The inner voice can either be mentally building us up or tearing us down.

It can be the difference between choosing resilience to be in a state we want or give up on the vision of what is possible. The term “giving up” can mean many things.

 What Giving Up Could Mean

  • allow a moment of challenge to define disempowerment
  • admit defeat or failure without a take-away
  • obstruct the flow of creative genius
  • forfeit self worth
  • ignore the choice of perspectives and possibilities
  • reject personal capability
  • denial of faith or hope
  • concede that there is no other way

There could be many more meanings that could be formed from one’s personal life definitions of “giving up.”

What remains to be true is the negative self talk aspects that limit the beliefs surrounding the idea or vision of “what is possible.”

What Does Negative Self Talk Really Mean

The goal of negative self talk is safety. The positive intention behind this type of communication is to avoid or prepare for the painful feelings derived from the mentally draining thoughts that create them. The perception that it won’t be as much of a shock if it happens because it was expected.

Learning to Shift the Negative Self Talk

The negative self talk can be appreciated when the intention is known. It’s meaning can be open to change. It does not have to mean it is the truth. When that aspect of “untruth” is acknowledged, a new insertion of meaning can be explored.

The self talk can be transformed into a new realm of positivity and empowered thoughts.

The transformation is possible because of choice. Choosing an intention for thought and becoming aligned in those thoughts.

Some chosen intentions to become aligned in thought could be; compassion, gratitude, trust, love, courage, curiosity, etc.

Whatever the chosen intentions are, they reflect the need to act on one’s potential, performance, possibility and purpose.

Courage over-rides the fears;

The fears of failing

The fears of doubting.

The fears of perfection.

The new self talk phrases align with the core messages;

“I can do this” 

“this is possible”

“Taking action now is more important than worrying about the outcome”

Shifting those moments of negative self talk requires practice and awareness. Understanding when the triggering patterns become active.

Stopping and slowing down.

Breathing.

Realigning to a chosen intention.

Refocusing on aligned inner communication.

A connectedness of communication that transforms the inner being of who you think you are, expanding what is possible through the wider scope of potential.

Acknowledgement of a strongly aligned intention reveals the vision to choose expanded transformational language.

Awakening From Sleep Walking Through Life

Bringing back feelings from being numb in life

Everyday stress and suffering over time becomes a self defense of numbness that is carried
around each day.

It may feel like, “always going through the motions in life.”
Not wanting to feel the hurtful or painful feelings. It pushes away the other emotions that are
wanting to be experienced. The joy, the gratitude, the possibility, the wonder within each day.

It is extraordinary how a perspective shifts that numbness. Refocusing on what brings life and
energy into each moment.
It no longer feels like things are “going through the motions.”
There is a purpose and commitment to feel again. A revitalized awakening that slowly opens
vision to exciting possibilities.
The realization that intention must be focused on the thoughts which demand attention to be
experienced.

The emotions need to be processed, acknowledged and accepted. A gentle handling without
judgement. An openness to refrain from judging the judgement of the emotions. Shame and
guilt are not wrong. They are sending me a message to uncover what they are trying to tell me.

Offering the choice to let go of suffering

The one small step of being in the presence of thought and emotion begins to shift perspective.
The soul wants to wake up.

It wants to be seen, it wants to be heard.
It is waiting for permission.
Each passing day that the soul is asleep, it becomes restless.
Continually trying to attract attention.

All the soul truly wants is to be reunited with the heart. To be guided in life with connected trust and courage.

Break the continual pattern of numbing out in an attempt to feel better through extreme
satiations that fill the void.
Binge watching, screen scrolling, addiction choosing activities to quiet the mind and avoid
feeling.
Fear of the attempt to break free from the safe space that has been established.
Curiosity and self discovery await a committed focus.

Begin to explore the questions,

“What wants to be acknowledged?”

“What part of me wants to be heard?”

“What would I rather be experiencing instead?”

“What do I need, what is required of me?”

Let my soul awaken from it’s slumber.

Let it breathe the fullness of being alive again.
Let the healing begin.
Let the unravelling be revealed.
Allow the transformation to unfold within.
May I see the vibrant colors of life.
May I be grateful for this moment I chose to see.

Coping With Depression Through Feelings Of Unhappiness

Unhappiness turns into depression

The moment when prolonged thoughts of unhappiness turn into coping with depression.

What do the prolonged unhappy thoughts feel like?

They feel dark. They feel painful. The feel suffocating. They drain energy from within.

Major life events can be the trigger of these thoughts. When the thoughts are created they project an emotion of helplessness, hopelessness that accompanies the thought.

This is the pivotal point when a decision is made to attach to the emotion of what is being experienced.

Over time a pattern of thought and emotional connection continue when it is triggered.

The warning signs may show being tired frequently, not having a restful sleep, sad, loss of interest in life, withdrawn and isolated.

Constantly “going through the motions” each day. Walking around numb to experiences and emotions.

Frequently feeling stuck with limited options. Everything just seems so difficult.

The belief forms, “I can’t.”

Every effort seems like a GIANT step.

Suffering in silence is then chosen as the best option. There is shame and guilt for feeling like this, being this way.

The Role Of Presence

Presence plays a major role in navigating through depression.

Taking the time to process feelings and emotions. One way to allow this process to take place is through self compassion. This will help to relieve the shame and guilt.

Daily habits contribute to the thoughts and emotions. Are the chosen daily habits serving or fueling the state of depression?

Self care is crucial to aid in producing energy, calming, and giving self comfort during the healing process.

Depression is a form of disconnection. A belief that there is minimal possibility or choice to transform what is being experienced.

The shift happens when the power to change is acknowledged within yourself.

Therefore, connection is important to begin facilitating hope, faith, trust and possibility.

Implementing ways to connect with self and others.

Are there support groups or communities that have people experiencing similar things?

Can you connect with them to share in the experience? This will help to connect back in life.

The choice is eventually made, it doesn’t have to be done alone.

Unhappy thought patterns are slowly converted into outlooks and perspectives that offer love, hope, possibility.

Clearing the way for thoughts of being in the presence of compassionate, mindful and inspired living.

A New Perspective From Letting Go

What makes it so hard to let go of hurt, pain, loss?

I have found it is the fear of how much of suffering will have to be endured until it goes away.

The thought of what has been impacted by the pain.

The constant attachment to the thoughts and emotions that continue to be a reminder of each experience.

When the choice is made to hold onto what is causing the fear, instantly choices become limited.

There is a meaning that has been attached to what is feared. The fear has become the focus of reality and all the decisions being made are based around the fear.

Letting go becomes a process. Going through the process of letting go requires presence.

There is a realization that there is no need to avoid what is desired to be let go of.

The internal process starts with awareness. Being aware of what is triggering the fear, and what the actual fear is.

Next is to acknowledge that the fear exists and what is being created by the fear.

Finally, it is accepting that you have a fear of what is being experienced. You are experiencing it in the moment, and that’s okay.

This gives the opportunity to shift perspective and it opens the possibility for choice.

Needing to express what needs to be expressed. The opportunity opens up for self compassion, forgiveness, gratitude.

This helps to form beliefs that attract focus for what is desired rather than what is being created by the fears.

Where would you like to be placing your focus?

Letting go becomes more about trust and belief in something greater than the fear that is being held onto. -Kristin Sven Larsen

Part 3—Embracing what life is offering through presence


Accept


Struggle is something that can’t be avoided at certain times in life. 

There are two choices that can be made when struggle appears.

It can be accepted or avoided.

Accepting the moment of struggle means seeing it as it actually is in the moment. That could be subjective, but what it really means is to accept what is being experienced in the moment.

Once resistance is chosen as the actionable thought, the struggle continues to evolve.

Avoiding can take the form of denial, repressing or blame.

Imagine avoiding who you are being, who someonelse is being, or what the situation is in the moment?

What is being created by avoiding?

Permission for irresponsibility and disregard for choice.

Accepting of “what is” in the moment gives permission for accountability and allows for personal ownership of the experience.

Accepting the moment filters down to fear. A subconscious thought may be, “if I avoid, repress or deny what is being experienced I will stay out of feeling hopeless and helpless.”

This may work for a brief time, then the resistance and struggle compiles.

You cannot change what you do not accept.

It doesn’t mean you have to like what you are accepting. That is when the power of choice is is presented. 

Acceptance can turn into action. You can lead yourself to be in charge of the choices.

It is not about giving up and quitting. 

In that moment, accept the experience for what it is without the need to blame or avoid no matter what the fear may be.

Acceptance shifts the experience. It opens the door to welcome new ways of being.

New ways of being create opportunities and possibilities. 

Acceptance can be thought of as a mirror reflection of what’s possible.

  • Frustration – Satisfied
  • Irritable – Patient
  • Anger – Calm
  • Mistake – Learning

A realization needs to develop through the choices of accepting what is happening. It makes it easier to accept the fears that are being avoided because accountability is formed from being present in the moment.

Photo Credit: Jeremy Yap

Part 2—Embracing what life is offering through presence


Acknowledge


The constructs of life are moments and experiences.

Within those experiences are the moments that accompany a choice. The choice to be present with them or let them pass by without acknowledging them.

It requires acknowledging them for what they are. Acknowledgment gets lost when they are viewed as what they are not or what they could be.

The experiences could be made from interactions with others or how a situation is presenting itself.

To acknowledge something means to admit it’s existence, to admit something has been received.

There are many aspects in life that can be acknowledged. It is part of the process of presence.

Acknowledge yourself. This could be through appreciation of who you are being in life or what you are doing in life. What you have in life. 

Allowing ourselves to acknowledge all our feelings and thoughts in their true form. With or without judgement. Simply acknowledging they exist.

It could also be accountability. Acknowledging mistakes or short comings. It helps to move from a place of fear and opens the window of possibility.

Most importantly, acknowledge where you are, in any experience. Being present to what is happening or the people you are connecting with in that experience.

Choose to acknowledge the gratitude for the experience. Then it will be present in the experience.

This means appreciating yourself, appreciating others and appreciating life. 

Celebrating all the elements that contribute to the moment you are living in.

It can mean shifting focus and changing the narrative. A perspective that creates hope and possibility.

It can mean admitting what is real and then deciding how to acknowledge the moment as it continues.

Photo Credit: Marcos Paulo Prado
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