Kristin Larsen

Ideas That Ignite Curiosity To Love With Courage!

The Inner Wound That Calls For Healing

Some days I wake up and I feel a need for personal growth in my day. Other days I can feel the inner wound that calls for healing.

That inner wound that calls for healing is trying to get my attention. As I listen, I try and decipher what kind of healing it wants.

The only way to truly know is to intentionally sink into presence. To be with the inner wound.

What Does The Inner Wound Want?

Does it want forgiveness from me?

Does it want my inner validation of love?

Does it want to be soothed and comforted from past painful memories?

Does it want reassurance that I will be ok and I am safe?

The past can slowly begin to manifest itself in daily life. That could be past wounds around time, safety, belonging, hurt feelings, physical and mental fatigue (burnout).

Maybe the fear that the feelings of past experiences are going to be “relived” again or will return.

Does it want to know that you are strong enough to get through these moments?

Comforting The Inner Wound

What the inner wound really wants is to be acknowledged. To be heard. To be understood. To know that it0 is cared for. The pain and hurt can still be present, but to know it is loved throughout the process of healing.

It doesn’t want judgement, silencing, avoiding or repression. It wants compassion and a supportive presence to affirm what it is experiencing in the moment.

Practicing Being Present With The Inner Wound

Being present with the inner wound means giving it focus and attention. Sometimes that may be difficult with life situations. It could mean setting aside time for the presence it wants and needs. It could be as little as 10 minutes each day. A possibility could be splitting up the total time commitment and distributing in various times of the day.

Times when you won’t be disturbed so that the inner wounds needs are honored and respected.

Allowing The Healing To Come

The healing comes when the space with the inner wound feels safe. A space where emotions can be expressed or released openly. A way that emotions can move around energetically. It could be expressed in many forms.

  • Compassionate meditation by holding a hand on your heart
  • Breathing and connecting to the safety of the breath
  • Self talk with positive affirmations and words of encouragement
  • Journaling to express feelings and thoughts
  • Taking a walk to move trapped energy in body
  • Connecting with the emotions in the body while laying down to notice and become aware of where they are

A space of inner healing begins with acknowledgement of the wound. The presence to express loving compassion for what is being experienced.

Unrealized Fierceness In Self Compassion

Self compassion is an important intentional daily living element in many life experiences. It is also important that another side of self compassion not be ignored. That other side is often the unrealized fierceness in self compassion.

What Is Fierce Self Compassion?

Fierce self compassion is making the choice to be an advocate for your needs through actions that supplement personal wellbeing in challenging moments.

Advocating for personal needs may be actions such as setting boundaries, saying no, protecting one’s rights and values that are important to them, becoming aware of and identifying your own unsupportive and harmful behaviors.

Why Fierce Self Compassion Is Unrealized

When the choice is presented to advocate for one’s own needs or protect personal rights of importance, fear creeps in and blurs the conviction of choice.

A scary thought that comfort and stability could be disrupted. The continued thoughts that judgement from others and self could emerge from taking the fierce action. The possibility that friction could dismantle the relationships. Deeper seeded beliefs begin to surface. “It will mean I’m selfish to honor my personal needs at this time.”

Fierce Self Compassion In Action

On both sides of self compassion there is an obligation to “be with” the feelings that are being experienced. Setting a boundary or standing up for yourself to protect your needs doesn’t have to mean straying from personal values that are important. It can take another form of expression that prioritizes love and connection instead of aggression and resentment.

Empowerment resides within the acceptance of feelings and honoring the kindness and actions associated with respecting aligned authentic expression.

Personal life examples of fierce self compassion might be;

  • Saying no to others or self when something doesn’t align with your values.
  • When you are not feeling well and make the decision to slow down, take a break and tend to your own needs to feel better.
  • The need to create a supportive habit for positive well being and be the motivated inspired energy required to follow through on the change.

While the tender-kindness side of self compassion focuses on soothing and accepting that state of our inner being. The other side of self compassion which is the fierce side, is more focused on tending to own needs to protect and motivate through actions of being-ness in the world.

The emphasis is suggested to be aware of balancing the tender kindness of self compassion with the advocation of one’s needs to maintain personal wellbeing.

The tender kindness of self compassion can be empowered with fierceness through a respected expression of self advocated importance.

Accepting The Invitation To Slow Down

The reluctance to go slower obstructs what many people believe is the true definition of what being productive or efficient really is.

However, accepting the invitation to slow down can be the core basis of connection and efficiency.

Resistance To Slowing Down

One main reason that makes it difficult to practice slowing down is the mental reasoning that slowing down equals loss of progression or efficiency.

Within that are the expectations that things must be done quickly to overcome, get results, and move forward. If they are not done in this way, sometimes the meaning that is made of ourself reflects what could be concluded to be inefficiency and transforms into self judgement of how we are functioning. It starts to feel restrictive and counterproductive.

Exploring deeper into the resistance might reveal an unwillingness to be present with other factors in the experience.

A desire to move through the discomfort as quickly as possible without fully processing or “being with” what is being experienced.

Benefits Of Slowing Down

Many benefits of slowing down attribute to connection. It helps to open the choice to process emotions while acknowledging what is happening in the experienced moments. This can lead to seeing other perspectives that are commonly overlooked. There are glimpses of joy in those perspectives. Feelings of contentment and gratitude.

Reducing stress is a direct result of slowing down because of how it calms the nervous system stress response. An opportunity to reacclimate to functioning from a neutral plane of calm and peacefulness.

When someone embodies calm, perspective, and gratitude, there is often clarity that emerges which assists with one’s own trust in their inner guidance.

Ideas To Embrace Slowing Down

Steps for slowing down in life can be accomplished in many ways. It can be implemented in the tasks being completed, the intentions of BEING that are simultaneously within the tasks and integrity of functioning. The art of slowing down in the day can also be comprised of micro-habits.

Some ideas to help embrace slowing down are:

  • Begin with the routine when waking up. What will help to establish aligned intentions of slowing down from the moment the day begins?
  • Eating meals mindfully to fully enjoy various aspects of the experience.
  • Checking in with self throughout the day to be present with the current inner state of thought and emotions.

Inviting small moments of silence by disconnecting from cell phone use and other distractions that prevent the commitment to slowing down.

If you were to start by thinking of your day as opportunities for inner connection, you begin to appreciate the importance to the commitment of slowing down.

The intention of slowing down presents an opportunity for deep inner connection.

Letting Intentions of Our Being-ness Lead

In each moment there is a thought to how we would like to function. It doesn’t always mean functioning in the way we would like. An important factor in functioning in the way we would like requires letting intentions of our being-ness lead.

To allow intentions of our being-ness to lead means understanding what intentions are and what their importance is in day to day life.

What is an intention of our being?

An intention is an idea that you plan to carry out. In order to carry out the intention you must be committed to it’s action. To be committed to it’s action you must embody the true essence of the intention. The intention requires determination to follow through with accompanying actions. It has been conceived in the mind and becomes the focus of being. The being-ness of the intention is devotion to it’s embodiment within.

What role do intentions of our being have in our life?

Intentions act as our guide in life. When they are paired with our values, they form a powerful combination of navigating influencers that lead the way.

Anyone can have an intention. What makes the intention significant is that it coincides with the true way of functioning that someone would like. The epicenter of operation can originate from the intention. Life could be in chaos but living from the intention could be the difference between staying grounded and focused or letting anxiety and disarray be in control.

I feel that, “intentions are the backbone of operating in our reality, no matter what is occurring in that reality.”

Being your intentions

What will be required to BE your intentions?

A commitment, a dedication, being integrity to the desired intentions. An example would be if I choose to be compassion, then my thoughts and actions must originate from that intention. It could mean shifting perspectives or changing my focus from contexts that are happening that don’t align with that intention. It might not necessarily mean I agree with everything that is occurring in that moment. However, it doesn’t change the intention of compassion that I choose to be in that moment.

What gets in the way of being our intentions

In many instances our ego gets in the way. Feeling the need for safety in one or various forms. To affirm self worth, love or finding a feeling of safety in an experience. A need to prove or be validated is what the ego wants to regain control or feel it is in control of the experience.

Coming back to our intentions means comforting the ego when it feels threatened. Soothing it and letting the heart-mind to have a moment to heal and restore. Self compassion could be a door opening intention for that to happen.

Commitment to letting our intentions of being-ness lead

The commitment is a dedicated focus to being the desired intentions. It could be a daily practice that creates awareness. The awareness then forms a choice to follow through on the required actions to be the intention. In time, it becomes a habit.
Moments could arise that displace being the intention. Acknowledging the agreement to be integrity for the intention recommits to embody the intention again without much delay.

The dedication to live by a chosen intention is an embodied integrity, “to be.”

Trust In The Unfolding Journey

The journey is continuously winding through peaks and valleys. It meanders through all types of weather. Various points along the way moving towards each stage of destination. All these paths will appear and be reached throughout it’s own unfolding. The joy often resides in the trust in the unfolding journey.

Does it make the journey any less extraordinary if things unfold differently than what was imagined?

There are parts of the path that seem clear. The steps are visible. The momentum is fluent with motivating guidance to reach the envisioned destination.

Then there are other parts of the path that are unclear. The way forward is not visible. Each step feels like a struggle.

What makes the path seem unclear and feel like a struggle?

Self Limiting Barriers

Inherently, we want to know. We worry about the outer abstracts. The things that either define, validate or fulfill a desire within a self-made construct in which to accomplish or complete.

The attachments to an obsession that it must unfold in the way that is envisioned. The attachment transforms into inner statements of,

“I will be/I will have _____ if ______ only when “X” happens.

These barriers prevent the invitation to surrender to what is being created through the unfolding process. The limitations force a fixed definition that makes an outcome unworthy of being appreciated.

Not Knowing The Way Forward

What if the journey was the objective instead of the destination?

It becomes the objective when the pressure of arriving at a destination in a set time or exact way can be released. Setting intentions that open space to enjoy all parts of the journey. Trust that things will unfold as they will in their own way.

In the welcoming of trust and enjoyment are dedicated intentions that allow them to be openly accepted.

The dedicated intentions such as gratitude, mindful, patient, peaceful, resourceful, courageous, compassionate, etc.

Can you still be with the parts that are painful, challenging, while appreciating the journey for what it is?

Why does it have to be more?

What is creating the thoughts that it has to be more?

Where We Get Lost In The Process

Being able to trust and appreciate what is unfolding allows a view into what wants to emerge. What wants to emerge in ourselves, along with an invitation to what wants to emerge in our life.

What is the guiding belief or thought that it has to be more than what it is?

We want our experience to be more than it is, and at the same time, we acknowledge the potential of what it can be. It really doesn’t have to be more. Our focus is usually attracted to the perception that it doesn’t meet our expectations. Within that, we are also acknowledging the possibility that our own potential did not meet our expectations. Where the paradox presents itself is when our judgement of what is happening in our experience is right or wrong, and good or bad.

If we let go of this, what can be invited in?

Shifting Perspective In The Unknown

There is acknowledgement that awaits in each step of the journey. We don’t need to have everything figured out to appreciate the magic, mystery and wonder in the unfolding.

What are the gifts that the journey is offering?

What will help to see what wants to emerge?

What will help us to acknowledge our potential within what wants to emerge?

Examples might include;

  • the connection being made to the emotional and mental state within self
  • the learning that is assisting with growth and understanding into our own beliefs and perceptions
  • the perspective to see the opportunity that is available in the experience instead of dwelling on the perceived negative effects

Could it be a shift in self that invites transformation into a new way of functioning from the commitment to another inner state of being?

The opportunity to transform curiosity over fear. Having trust in the unknown. Letting go of control to be in flow.

To acknowledge what wants to emerge means accepting where we are at in the moment. Viewing the current moment as a part of growth and evolution in who we are becoming. There are opportunities to explore the inner questions that are circulating in the mind. Trust in taking steps in the unknown which may feel uncomfortable. Choosing opportunities that align with growth and evolution of self. Continuing to embrace the ideas that are being called into existence. Living the passion of the path that is unfolding with a purpose that combines the talents and abilities that we possess.

Opening up to the guiding light that illuminates the way to our truest self.

A shift in self happens when trust guides the readiness towards the embodiment of what wants to emerge within the core of our being.

Expanding The Inner Capacity For Unease

Many meanings could be derived from the word “unease.” A few meanings that come to my mind when I think of unease are stress, tension, struggle, and discomfort. I have thought about how someone is capable of expanding the inner capacity for unease in the moment.

As I reflect on my own experiences, I acknowledge one area of focus which helps reduce unease. It is the nourishing actions that can be taken to navigate the stresses in the experiences. The other invitation is to expand the inner capacity to be with the unease.

What could expanding the inner capacity to be with unease mean?

Staying Stuck in the Unease

In that state of frustration, helplessness, powerlessness, it is not reasonable to imagine or see the possibility to have the capacity to be with unease. It can be extremely uncomfortable. It might feel like something must be wrong. A strong-willed judgement about what is being experienced.

An inner subconscious voice says it is something that must be solved. There are steps that must be taken to relieve the suffering as if resembling some sort of systematic equation.

It feels like there is relief when a result is produced. It could be a desired outcome, remembering when a desired outcome happened, feeling belief in something, feeling accepted by others, feeling connection with others, the ideation of being right, honoring one’s own values. *

Getting Unstuck From the Unease

Something that remains constant in the discomfort of unease is choice. The ego wants to have input towards if the choice will be legitimately helpful or safe to move away from unease.

What can be helpful in transforming a disempowering experience into an empowering experience is dedicating focus to habits and behavior.

Taking the time to understand what habits support being with unease and navigating in it’s space. Some habits may include practicing self compassion, meditating, praying, slowing down to be in silence, journaling, exercise, yoga, or simply getting outside in nature.

Creating awareness for behaviors that nurture the evolution of healing and empowerment. Authentic self expression that enables acceptance for vulnerability. Having accountability for the intentions being lived into. Allowing trust to encompass being within the experience.

Being With The Unease In Grace

The discomfort is setting in. I am feeling helpless. I am not seeing choices. I am feeling the stress of this experience. I notice my breathing speeding up. My awareness offers a choice that I now see. I place my focus on my breath. I take a moment to slow it down. Giving my attention to deep inhales and exhales. My awareness is expanding. I notice the tension in my body. With each exhale, I give myself permission to release the tension from my body. In this release I give myself compassion. This is a moment of struggle. May I give myself love and understanding right now. I will let this be ok, I will be ok.

As I surrender to this moment I feel a sense of peace. I am at peace. Possibility enters my vision. Gently, I ask myself what I need right now.

Subtly, I realize I am now with the unease in a greater capacity.

Awareness awakens the possibility to surrender in the moment. The invitation to kindly ask “what is available to give to self.”

*Information referenced from National Library of Medicine, (article) The Unease Modulation Model: An Experiential Model of Stress With Implications for Health, Stress Management, and Public Policy, https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6567485/

The Urgency To Live

Clarity About Urgency To Live

The convergence of urgency and comfort invites an opportunity to shift an experience with an altered perception of time.

A perception of time could be swayed by thoughts or feelings on both extremes of the spectrum.  One perception is the distorted illusion of unlimited time and the other extreme could be the belief of being stuck in moments or experiences.

When I think of time, from the standpoint from beginning to end in the current life, it does not seem unlimited. I also think of time as being infinite. The belief that time has no end. It seems like a confliction of what time is. It could be subjective if someone believes that physical life may end, and the spiritual journey continues.

To focus on the specific physical presence in life would suggest there is a path to the end.

When the end appears, there can be an assumption that there are many reflective insights that arise for the time lived.

Documented thoughts from others near the end of their life include appreciations, regrets, forgiveness, remorse, love.

Why it takes a lifetime to realize the reflective insights

The false reality many people hold in their mind is commonly mistaking they have unlimited time in their life.

At what points in life do people start thinking about time as a precious gift?

Usually there are disruptions or reminders that interrupt the false reality of unlimited time.

It could be when someone close, like a best friend or family member passes away. A revelation for the physical end of life. A gentle prompt of reality for aging and mortality.

It may or may not persuade one’s perspective of time. It definitely infuses the curiosity to think about it.

 Curiosity could then lead someone down a tunnel of despair thinking about everything they “must do now” with a maintained focus on the ending.

It isn’t about the time urgency to do tasks. It is about the time urgency to be the person you envision being in your life.

Am I taking the time to love others and myself?

Am I taking the time to appreciate the moments in life?

Am I taking the time to live with inner peace?

Looking deeper into these individual questions, the answers reside in the question, “what does this mean to me?”

What living with urgency really means

I believe it is a simple philosophy.
To live with integrity. To live in your values. To love deeply. To care for yourself. To care for others.

There can be many temptations that get in the way of someone not following this philosophy. In most cases, following the ego leads us astray.

Attachment to the thoughts of anger, disappointment, failure are some of the major attention grabbers for the ego. Depending how intense the attachment is will determine how long the ego will be followed on the journey. Gradually taking someone further and further away from the simple philosophies they want to live by. The perception becomes; they no longer seem simple.

Days, months and years pass. Not realizing the habits and perceptions have denied the proper love and caring that was always wanted.

This includes escaping, avoiding and running away from challenges that life is presenting. Respect must be given for the current state someone is functioning. However, that does not preclude the potential and possibility of shifting that state. Regaining focus and realigning commitment to the things that are most important. Those “things” of importance are what become urgent to care for.

There is a responsibility to act with urgency. Being accountable not only to oneself, but to others that encompass the ripple effect in life’s sphere of connection.

Redemption of integrity is tightly woven into the values of love and caring. It requires being prompt in those aligned actions.

Bring Awareness In The Body

Bring awareness back in your body to stay focused in life

To stay focused requires minimal distraction in the mind. It is interesting how chaos could ensue around someone, yet they are able to maintain focus.

I wonder why that is?

A typical day in life for example, getting lost in all the intricacies of tasks, obligations, responsibilities.

How can someone stay focused with so much going on?

Being in tune with our senses of what is occurring in our body can help to maintain focus on the joy of who we are, what is happening in our perceptual world.

It is a form of appreciative acknowledgement. Accepting what is happening without resistance.

The awareness in our body connects us back to ourselves.

It is a grounding into the current moment.

Tune into the moment without the chaos diverting our attention somewhere other than what is happening right now.

The mind connects back with the body.

You take the time to feel your feet on the ground. You allow yourself to be open to observation as time was taken to notice.

To feel the sensations, the energy in your body.

Where are they being held, stored, restricted?

Taking small steps to incorporate awareness in your body throughout the day will provide advantages of focus in life.

You may notice yourself stepping out of fear based thinking, listening with greater intention, less frustration, overall appreciative awareness for right now.

3 Ways To Create Awareness In The Body

  1. Body Scan
  2. Movement
  3. Intentional Reflection/Expression

The body scan is a technique used to intentionally bring attention to individual parts of the body without judging them.

Movement when done mindfully helps to connect yourself back to your body to truly feel the various areas of the body in greater appreciation.

Intentional reflection offers a form of expression that creates a conscious awareness of the things that benefit the body in it’s functioning and movement while also identifying what obstructs it’s effectiveness.

Connecting back to the body is a choice that aids in the life healing process. It allows feelings and thoughts to surface that would otherwise be suppressed.

As the practice becomes stronger, so does the efficiency of how quickly someone can tune into their body.

After experimenting with the sensations in the body, bring them into awareness and feel a powerful experience of focused presence within you.

Connection to the body is a conscious awareness to the residing messages below the superficial functioning in life.

Scroll to Top