Kristin Larsen

Moving Through The Seasons Of Grief

While driving on a local rural road, I noticed the leaves beginning to change color. My windows were open, and the smell of the fall season was in the air. Suddenly, emotions flooded within me like a tidal wave. It felt like moving through the seasons of grief.

Has it happened to you?

One second, you are in the presence of life, and the next, memories invade your current space of peace.

Triggered by the reminder of something you see, a familiar smell, a word or a phrase you hear, a flavor from a food, a texture that you touch.

It reminds you of someone who is no longer physically there in your life. Your heart begins to ache, and you miss them. The imagery created in that moment takes you back into memories of the past. A place that carries an open wound of grief from something that feels like it was lost.

Surrendering to love

There is an opportunity to acknowledge the hurt and pain that surfaces. In this opportunity, there is an invitation to surrender to love. A way to appreciate and honor the person who has moved on to the next phase in life. It is a reminder of how important they were.

There are many ways to honor and appreciate them. One way is through the expression of emotion. Cry, journal, or share your thoughts and feelings with others.

It doesn’t have to mean staying in the loss of suffering. The perspective of love can assist with moving through the seasons of grief.

Choosing the perspective of love

Celebrating and honoring the person or memory amidst the grief could mean seeing the perspective of love in the memories. The way to do that is through a self-compassionate lens. Accessing the lens requires acknowledging the love for that memory. The love for the person.

Be open to what is calling for attention from the surfacing grief.

Each chosen effort to acknowledge the grief, to see through the perspective of love, expands the capacity to fully love.

As the seasons change, so too will the grief pass through.

Focus transmutes grief into an appreciation of love that was never lost.

What Is The Human Experience?

How do we interpret what we think the human experience is?

One person’s interpretation may differ from another person’s interpretation of what they believe the human experience is.

What influences someone’s belief in their interpretation of what the human experience is?

Superficially, the interpretation of the human experience could be conceived as the theory of cause and effect. One of the meanings of cause and effect is described as; “the direct relationship between an action or event and its consequence or result.”

Logic prevails in seeking interpretation. Beliefs reinforce the conceptual understanding of what the human experience is supposed to be.

If you look back at your childhood, and every five years after, how is your interpretation of the human experience compared to this current moment?

Did it change or is it the same?

If it changed, what created the change?

What has allowed it to remain the same?

The external environment, culture, or society is usually a contributing influencer to how someone may interpret the human experience as their reality.

Psychologically, cognitive rationality is essential to form a sense of reality in the living moment.

What is the relationship between the interpretation of the human experience and reality?

Can there be a right or wrong interpretation of the human experience? If each person has their beliefs of what the human experience is, can it be a neutral experience?

What we are born to know is the physical, mental, and emotional side of the human experience. The spiritual element can be learned, practiced or realized.

The physical side is the realization of birth, growth, emotions, and death.

The emotional side is the internal feelings that are associated with the emotion.

The mental side is how our thoughts, emotions, and perceptions are processed.

The spiritual side is the connection to something greater than self, which contains meaning, purpose, and a sense of belonging.

Residing deeper within the main elements of the human experience is profound consciousness. It involves being aware of what is being experienced within the elements.

The riveting part of awareness is choice. A choice to live into experiences as an individual or an interconnected being.

The interpretation of our experiences is always evolving. What is deemed important about our experiences today, may not hold the same importance tomorrow.

The acceptance of the human experience is what leads to fulfillment within it. Setbacks, grief, and suffering don’t feel the same as opportunity, joy, or love. Acceptance is the possibility to invite appreciation to the whole human experience. To transform what is perceived as negative, into a deeper awareness of what is within the experience. An appreciation for the challenge, the opportunity within it, the connection, the love, the possibility, and the shared moments.

Is it the continual quest for meaning and purpose that clarifies what our interpretation of the human experience is?

If you knew it was your final day to live in this physical world, what interpretations would become clear about what the human experience is?

To accept the whole human experience with appreciation introduces a choice for conscious awareness of the deeper elements within it.

Spiritual Side of Personal Growth

Various moments in life invite a call to access our inner capabilities. In those moments are growth opportunities. There is a spiritual side of personal growth that is often unrealized.

It is a continual learning process that never stops if it is allowed to develop.

Important attributes of personal growth could be habits and behaviors that assist with achievement or facilitate a desired outcome.

It is important to acknowledge that personal growth assists with learning new skills, completing goals, taking responsive action while embracing challenges that arise.

Personal growth is an important part of life. It necessitates “doing” what is envisioned in life.

Unrealized Side Personal Growth

What is the unrealized side of personal growth?

Awareness is one unrealized spiritual aspect of personal growth. Awareness initiates the inner path of authentic transformation when practiced and developed.

It can involve developing self-reflection practices, deepening intuition, and learning to maintain alignment with self.

A second unrealized spiritual aspect of personal growth is redefining and aligning to what success is through the lens of spirit.

Incorporating the objective of being into the process of doing infuses purpose into achievement. Alignment with values becomes an important consideration as the task of growth develops. Awakening to evolvement of inner self.

The third unrealized spiritual aspect of personal growth is to listen to your inner knowing. In that listening is trust and connectedness to the spiritual self.

The fourth unrealized spiritual aspect of personal growth is the embodiment of wholeness. The practice of awareness enhances the ability to balance ambition and alignment with oneself. The priority is placed upon honoring the soul side of performance.

Layering Personal Growth with Spiritual Growth

Using spirituality as a source for personal growth cultivates a deepening of the soul.

The presence of spiritual embodiment invites compassion and connection. Emphasizing understanding for others and self through empathy. One can develop a sense of unity and connection with humanity. This can enhance the strengthening of relationships with alignment to something greater than self through choices.

A pathway to inner peace and resilience is formed in the spiritual embodiment. This supports grounding in calm throughout uncertainty and challenges.

Cultivating Habits of Spiritual Growth

Spiritual growth habits that support personal growth are traditional practices that promote mindfulness, gratitude, and forgiveness.

Some practices may include:

  • mindful breathing
  • body scan
  • meditation
  • self reflection journaling
  • self compassion practice
  • forgiveness letters

Integrating some of these practices into your daily life can create a positive and fulfilling life. This can support both sides of personal growth.

Spiritual embodiment supports the evolving fulfillment of personal growth with the constructs of inner alignment.

Accepting The Invitation To Slow Down

The reluctance to go slower obstructs what many people believe is the true definition of what being productive or efficient really is.

However, accepting the invitation to slow down can be the core basis of connection and efficiency.

Resistance To Slowing Down

One main reason that makes it difficult to practice slowing down is the mental reasoning that slowing down equals loss of progression or efficiency.

Within that are the expectations that things must be done quickly to overcome, get results, and move forward. If they are not done in this way, sometimes the meaning that is made of ourself reflects what could be concluded to be inefficiency and transforms into self judgement of how we are functioning. It starts to feel restrictive and counterproductive.

Exploring deeper into the resistance might reveal an unwillingness to be present with other factors in the experience.

A desire to move through the discomfort as quickly as possible without fully processing or “being with” what is being experienced.

Benefits Of Slowing Down

Many benefits of slowing down attribute to connection. It helps to open the choice to process emotions while acknowledging what is happening in the experienced moments. This can lead to seeing other perspectives that are commonly overlooked. There are glimpses of joy in those perspectives. Feelings of contentment and gratitude.

Reducing stress is a direct result of slowing down because of how it calms the nervous system stress response. An opportunity to reacclimate to functioning from a neutral plane of calm and peacefulness.

When someone embodies calm, perspective, and gratitude, there is often clarity that emerges which assists with one’s own trust in their inner guidance.

Ideas To Embrace Slowing Down

Steps for slowing down in life can be accomplished in many ways. It can be implemented in the tasks being completed, the intentions of BEING that are simultaneously within the tasks and integrity of functioning. The art of slowing down in the day can also be comprised of micro-habits.

Some ideas to help embrace slowing down are:

  • Begin with the routine when waking up. What will help to establish aligned intentions of slowing down from the moment the day begins?
  • Eating meals mindfully to fully enjoy various aspects of the experience.
  • Checking in with self throughout the day to be present with the current inner state of thought and emotions.

Inviting small moments of silence by disconnecting from cell phone use and other distractions that prevent the commitment to slowing down.

If you were to start by thinking of your day as opportunities for inner connection, you begin to appreciate the importance to the commitment of slowing down.

The intention of slowing down presents an opportunity for deep inner connection.

Trust In The Unfolding Journey

The journey is continuously winding through peaks and valleys. It meanders through all types of weather. Various points along the way moving towards each stage of destination. All these paths will appear and be reached throughout it’s own unfolding. The joy often resides in the trust in the unfolding journey.

Does it make the journey any less extraordinary if things unfold differently than what was imagined?

There are parts of the path that seem clear. The steps are visible. The momentum is fluent with motivating guidance to reach the envisioned destination.

Then there are other parts of the path that are unclear. The way forward is not visible. Each step feels like a struggle.

What makes the path seem unclear and feel like a struggle?

Self Limiting Barriers

Inherently, we want to know. We worry about the outer abstracts. The things that either define, validate or fulfill a desire within a self-made construct in which to accomplish or complete.

The attachments to an obsession that it must unfold in the way that is envisioned. The attachment transforms into inner statements of,

“I will be/I will have _____ if ______ only when “X” happens.

These barriers prevent the invitation to surrender to what is being created through the unfolding process. The limitations force a fixed definition that makes an outcome unworthy of being appreciated.

Not Knowing The Way Forward

What if the journey was the objective instead of the destination?

It becomes the objective when the pressure of arriving at a destination in a set time or exact way can be released. Setting intentions that open space to enjoy all parts of the journey. Trust that things will unfold as they will in their own way.

In the welcoming of trust and enjoyment are dedicated intentions that allow them to be openly accepted.

The dedicated intentions such as gratitude, mindful, patient, peaceful, resourceful, courageous, compassionate, etc.

Can you still be with the parts that are painful, challenging, while appreciating the journey for what it is?

Why does it have to be more?

What is creating the thoughts that it has to be more?

Where We Get Lost In The Process

Being able to trust and appreciate what is unfolding allows a view into what wants to emerge. What wants to emerge in ourselves, along with an invitation to what wants to emerge in our life.

What is the guiding belief or thought that it has to be more than what it is?

We want our experience to be more than it is, and at the same time, we acknowledge the potential of what it can be. It really doesn’t have to be more. Our focus is usually attracted to the perception that it doesn’t meet our expectations. Within that, we are also acknowledging the possibility that our own potential did not meet our expectations. Where the paradox presents itself is when our judgement of what is happening in our experience is right or wrong, and good or bad.

If we let go of this, what can be invited in?

Shifting Perspective In The Unknown

There is acknowledgement that awaits in each step of the journey. We don’t need to have everything figured out to appreciate the magic, mystery and wonder in the unfolding.

What are the gifts that the journey is offering?

What will help to see what wants to emerge?

What will help us to acknowledge our potential within what wants to emerge?

Examples might include;

  • the connection being made to the emotional and mental state within self
  • the learning that is assisting with growth and understanding into our own beliefs and perceptions
  • the perspective to see the opportunity that is available in the experience instead of dwelling on the perceived negative effects

Could it be a shift in self that invites transformation into a new way of functioning from the commitment to another inner state of being?

The opportunity to transform curiosity over fear. Having trust in the unknown. Letting go of control to be in flow.

To acknowledge what wants to emerge means accepting where we are at in the moment. Viewing the current moment as a part of growth and evolution in who we are becoming. There are opportunities to explore the inner questions that are circulating in the mind. Trust in taking steps in the unknown which may feel uncomfortable. Choosing opportunities that align with growth and evolution of self. Continuing to embrace the ideas that are being called into existence. Living the passion of the path that is unfolding with a purpose that combines the talents and abilities that we possess.

Opening up to the guiding light that illuminates the way to our truest self.

A shift in self happens when trust guides the readiness towards the embodiment of what wants to emerge within the core of our being.

Realizing Your True Potential

How Do You Know What Your True Potential Is?

As life unfolds, each experience presents the opportunity to realize our true potential. 
Our true potential could manifest from many forms of action. It can be a choice, an intention, a commitment, an inspiration, a vision, a responsibility.

What if it was as simple as acknowledging who you would like to be in a moment, believing in your capability, having conviction in what is possible?


If you think about these 3 statements, what arises within you?


The true potential understands the acceptance in those statements.
The focus of true potential is not concerned with worry or doubt in the moment.
The present moment IS the objective, to thrive in the fullest expression of yourself. Contained within that fullness of expression is immense gratitude.

When Will Be The Moment Of Realizing Your True Potential?


A noticeable shift will occur. The shift is an inner energy that accompanies a chosen state of being. It is a higher state of consciousness. An attuned frequency that connects to your soul. A decision to accept capability to embrace the true potential within you. The focus of concern for a result, a failure or attachment to other external influences fades into the background as the courageous authentic form of yourself leads with powerful intention and integrity.

When were the moments in your life where you accessed your true potential?

Take a moment to reflect what occurred within yourself during those moments.

What shifted in your thoughts? 

What shifted in your energy?

What shifted in your perspective or focus?

What shifted in beliefs?

What shifted in your physiology? 

What was your new self concept of yourself?

There are 4 experiences that come to my mind when I think of some defining moments in my life where I made the decision to access my true potential;

  • The Birth of our first child
  • Performing new job role in my work career
  • Enrolling in a health coaching course
  • Participating in a transformational leadership course

The Choice to Embrace Everything That Already Exists Within

To add some context, these four experiences were lived in five years or more apart from each other. They layered learning and growth that I had navigated in my life to that point.

The first experience was the birth of our first child. Leading to that moment was excitement, anticipation, excellence, quest for knowledge, preparation. These areas of focus minimized the worry and doubt. I had already committed to being the best father I could be. My only worries or doubts came in the form of not being able to live up to those expectations I was committing to.The true potential I was able to access was being able to adapt to situations and become resourceful quickly. Embracing an embodiment of self compassion and loving care. Accepting a responsibility to something/someone that served a purpose greater than myself. I was able to do many things I had never done before or thought I could do with such confidence. The moment my child was presented to me, I held him with amazement and wonder. How could I be holding such a gift of life in my arms? It was a precious, sacred moment that filled me with pure joy and gratitude. My true potential emerged to be my commitment through my intentions each day. To be a supportive husband and loving partnership in the learning and growth in those new moments.

The second experience was performing a new role in my work career. Feeling stagnant at my work, I decided to try something new. It meant getting outside my comfort zone. It meant there was a potential for making mistakes. The opportunity was presented to develop my communication skills, conceptualize processes, adapt to learning, and share ideas to support the performance of others to implement their new learning. It meant being committed to being an important part of establishing a team effort to maximize the development of effective results.

The third experience was enrolling in a health coaching program because I came to the realization it was my calling. It required me to look within myself and be present with my insecurities. To put the higher purpose of supporting someone before my own egoic agenda. I learned how to ask powerful questions, understand what contributes to a strong mindset and healthy functioning in life. Helping someone to implement many habits that are life changing. It was something I could help someone make transformational changes in their life. All because I was able to hold a space of compassion, support, accountability, encouragement and possibility. They were powerful intentions that I embraced within myself.

The fourth experience was participating in a transformational leadership course. Over a 3 month period I created a strong bond with other program participants. We practiced living into our intentions, supporting each other, being a stand for each other, holding each other accountable, connecting with each other, loving each other and holding each other at our highest selves. It was a challenging experience which brought out many patterns that created obstacles for ourselves, limiting beliefs, and pain that required presence and healing. There were lessons in every part of the experience. I released parts of me that I knew were inside but not able to come out and lead. I was introduced to what it feels like to live in higher self. To let go and surrender to what is. To accept myself for who I am so I could be the person I chose through my commitment and intentions.

What these experiences taught me was that a direct connection between possibility and potential exists. Believing in both and trusting that a higher dimension of oneself is awaiting acknowledgement. What got in the way of realizing my true potential was my ego, daily habits that were not supporting my higher self, my continual patterns of disfunction and the required healing to let go of the attachment to inner suffering. It prevented me from being the full expression of my authentic self and to embrace the wholehearted person that I am meant to be in life.

What have the pivotal moments in your life taught you about what holds you back from realizing your true potential?

A choice exists to view true potential as a future possibility that allows the belief to also be a present reality.

Negative Self Talk Dilemma

The Inner Voice Guidance

There is an inner voice we all have that is communicating. If you think it is muted, you might be unconsciously aware of what is being communicated internally.

The challenge is cultivating the awareness to hear when the inner voice is speaking. Move through the conflict of the negative self talk dilemma. Many people think if they choose to listen they might have to do or be what the voice is communicating. Taking what is being said as “truth.”

I have found that by choosing not to acknowledge the voice, it continues to get intensified, trying to get my attention.

The inner voice can either be mentally building us up or tearing us down.

It can be the difference between choosing resilience to be in a state we want or give up on the vision of what is possible. The term “giving up” can mean many things.

 What Giving Up Could Mean

  • allow a moment of challenge to define disempowerment
  • admit defeat or failure without a take-away
  • obstruct the flow of creative genius
  • forfeit self worth
  • ignore the choice of perspectives and possibilities
  • reject personal capability
  • denial of faith or hope
  • concede that there is no other way

There could be many more meanings that could be formed from one’s personal life definitions of “giving up.”

What remains to be true is the negative self talk aspects that limit the beliefs surrounding the idea or vision of “what is possible.”

What Does Negative Self Talk Really Mean

The goal of negative self talk is safety. The positive intention behind this type of communication is to avoid or prepare for the painful feelings derived from the mentally draining thoughts that create them. The perception that it won’t be as much of a shock if it happens because it was expected.

Learning to Shift the Negative Self Talk

The negative self talk can be appreciated when the intention is known. It’s meaning can be open to change. It does not have to mean it is the truth. When that aspect of “untruth” is acknowledged, a new insertion of meaning can be explored.

The self talk can be transformed into a new realm of positivity and empowered thoughts.

The transformation is possible because of choice. Choosing an intention for thought and becoming aligned in those thoughts.

Some chosen intentions to become aligned in thought could be; compassion, gratitude, trust, love, courage, curiosity, etc.

Whatever the chosen intentions are, they reflect the need to act on one’s potential, performance, possibility and purpose.

Courage over-rides the fears;

The fears of failing

The fears of doubting.

The fears of perfection.

The new self talk phrases align with the core messages;

“I can do this” 

“this is possible”

“Taking action now is more important than worrying about the outcome”

Shifting those moments of negative self talk requires practice and awareness. Understanding when the triggering patterns become active.

Stopping and slowing down.

Breathing.

Realigning to a chosen intention.

Refocusing on aligned inner communication.

A connectedness of communication that transforms the inner being of who you think you are, expanding what is possible through the wider scope of potential.

Acknowledgement of a strongly aligned intention reveals the vision to choose expanded transformational language.

Awakening From Sleep Walking Through Life

Bringing back feelings from being numb in life

Everyday stress and suffering over time becomes a self defense of numbness that is carried
around each day.

It may feel like, “always going through the motions in life.”
Not wanting to feel the hurtful or painful feelings. It pushes away the other emotions that are
wanting to be experienced. The joy, the gratitude, the possibility, the wonder within each day.

It is extraordinary how a perspective shifts that numbness. Refocusing on what brings life and
energy into each moment.
It no longer feels like things are “going through the motions.”
There is a purpose and commitment to feel again. A revitalized awakening that slowly opens
vision to exciting possibilities.
The realization that intention must be focused on the thoughts which demand attention to be
experienced.

The emotions need to be processed, acknowledged and accepted. A gentle handling without
judgement. An openness to refrain from judging the judgement of the emotions. Shame and
guilt are not wrong. They are sending me a message to uncover what they are trying to tell me.

Offering the choice to let go of suffering

The one small step of being in the presence of thought and emotion begins to shift perspective.
The soul wants to wake up.

It wants to be seen, it wants to be heard.
It is waiting for permission.
Each passing day that the soul is asleep, it becomes restless.
Continually trying to attract attention.

All the soul truly wants is to be reunited with the heart. To be guided in life with connected trust and courage.

Break the continual pattern of numbing out in an attempt to feel better through extreme
satiations that fill the void.
Binge watching, screen scrolling, addiction choosing activities to quiet the mind and avoid
feeling.
Fear of the attempt to break free from the safe space that has been established.
Curiosity and self discovery await a committed focus.

Begin to explore the questions,

“What wants to be acknowledged?”

“What part of me wants to be heard?”

“What would I rather be experiencing instead?”

“What do I need, what is required of me?”

Let my soul awaken from it’s slumber.

Let it breathe the fullness of being alive again.
Let the healing begin.
Let the unravelling be revealed.
Allow the transformation to unfold within.
May I see the vibrant colors of life.
May I be grateful for this moment I chose to see.

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